WEEKLY HUMOR

	20th Century Headlines
1981:   MTV Brings Western Civilization to Official Halt. 1981:   Reagan Shot En Route to NRA Fund-Raiser. 1981:   Sandra Day O'Connor Receives Congratulatory Pat on the Behind from Fellow Justices. 1984:   "Mondale Fever" Sweeps Minnesota, District of Columbia. 1985:   "We Are the World" Gives Hope to Rock Has-Beens Starving for a Hit. 1987:   Ollie North Wins Daytime Emmy. 1988:   Democratic Platform Not High Enough to Make Dukakis Visible. 1989:   Chinese Authorities Kick Off "Keep Tiananmen Square Clean" Week with Special Tank Sweepers. 1989:   Scientist Achieves Cold Fusion on Honeymoon. 1991:   Iraqi Army Stages Spirited 3/8-of-a-Second Counteroffensive. 1993:   "For God's Sake, Use a Decent Camera!" Pleads Extraterrestrial. 1994:   Abstinence TV Spots Boost Teen Celibacy to a Record 0.0002 Percent. 1996:   Desperate Postmaster General Tries to Hand Deliver E-Mail. 1997:   AOL Offers 50 Hours of Free Downtime. 1998:   Wave of 1970s Nostalgia Drives Up Oil Prices.

 




 

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